We tend to either not see ourselves in others that we render judgment on, or we see ourselves clearly but with such scrutiny as to amplify the negative to such a degree that it overwhelms all else. It erodes our confidence and self-worth until we become that ugly thing which we think we already are.
The trick I think is in learning to step outside of oneself. To gaze upon your actions and assess them with objectivity but not harshness. To render judgment where necessary. Not for the purpose of punishment, but to constantly strive for the furtherance of positive personal change.
- Only the sociopath fails to see the negative.
- Only the damaged fail to see the positive.
- Only the ignorant fail to accept who they are today as being enough because that would mean they shouldn’t strive to be better (a misguided affliction to be sure)
Negative thoughts and actions are the neutron stars of emotion. Their density is so much greater in proportion to their size that they make finding balance such a difficult proposal.
One snide comment, one rude glance…these minuscule moments in time carry enough power to overrule the rest of an entire day. We must create scales within us that measure these time twisting moments more accurately so as to achieve perspective.
Don’t shy away from criticism, real or perceived. Examine it, there may be nuggets of truth and wisdom in there. You must however, remove it of its emotional power. Render it harmless. Cut the blue wire, but before walking away examine what the bomb was made of. If there is something to learn there, take it with you and say thank you. Otherwise, leave that bastard right where it was and move along.